Personal Log Out: Live Long and Prosper

Douglas Adams quote

I find myself in the process of closing out some chapters of my life: I have taken a vacation, most likely permanent, from my Etsy shop. I am in the throws of becoming a fairly extreme minimalist. (I have almost circled back around to where I started.)  I may even sell my house.  And now I am wishing you all a happy life and taking a vacation, most likely permanent, from my blog. I am not sure if I am just freeing myself up for the next adventure waiting around the corner or unburdening myself of … What? Mental and emotional baggage? Perhaps that is how we move on. We unburden ourselves of everything and set down a new path hoping to find our bliss.

Thank you for following and reading my blog.  I hope that I have helped, inspired, given you food for thought, or entertained you in some way.

Reminiscing Recap and Conclusions

On October 31, 2010, nearly 6 years ago I started this blog.  If I recall correctly, I wanted to blog about minimalism – as I had been a minimalist for a very long time and “thought” I had a lot to say on the subject.  Turns out I didn’t really have a lot to say about it.  I had been doing it so long at that point – what was there to say.  I think it might have been easier if I were in the process of journeying toward minimalism, as I could have then expressed tries, fails, and learning along the way, etc.  For me though it was and still is about maintaining good habits that were built, processed, and set a long time ago.  All that is required is a tweak here and there.  And, that was boring for me to write about.

Minimalism Conclusion:  In every area of your life, less is better.  Way less is best.

Blogging was hard for me.  I discovered that I don’t like to share my life with the world (not being involved in any kind of social media should have been a clue, but…), so finding topics was difficult.  For a time I hardly blogged about anything mostly because I didn’t know what to write about.  I didn’t really want to write about art as I do that all day long everyday…  I like the Zen, Buddhist, and Taoist philosophies in an intellectual-sort of way, but I am not passionately religious about them.  I prefer to use the parts that make for a balanced, happy, and fulfilled life and leave the rest for the religiously inclined.  So, again, I think there is not a great deal to say on such subjects.  I did give to the blogosphere some of my very favorite guided meditations and I hope you enjoy and use them to your best advantage.

Conclusion for Art (Moving Meditation):  Do it.  Find something that takes you to a Zen place and do it.  Often.  Examples: Art, cooking, motorcycle maintenance, coloring, tinkering, DIY-ing, exercising, etc.

Zen Conclusion:  Follow the middle path.  Everything in moderation.  Reduce your attachments.  Meditate.  Detach from outcome.  Be mindful.  Become a single-tasker.  Etc.

In the last year or so my life has been upheaved again and again.  But factoring in my career, political views of the institution, and conduct policies surrounding it, writing about “the care and feeding of one’s sociopath” might not be the best move.  Also, it seems much to personal.  And, hurtful to the non-innocent person involved.  Perhaps under a pen name?

Coming to terms with what a close family member really is, finally understanding (somewhat), and trying to figure out how to proceed from here has been and continues to be taxing.  And maybe even liberating?  Good days and bad days…  It is wonderful to (sort of) let go of the guilt (blame) that it is not mom and dad’s fault, not my fault, and not even their fault – as they were born this way.  I only wish the “one” could understand it, but probably never will – as there is always just blaming, anger, manipulation, etc.

I Don’t Know What is Next

I have sold or gotten rid of most of my things.  My subconscious is screaming at me to get rid of the rest (and, I think I will?).  I am even seriously considering selling my house – as now it is almost empty.  I have bought and taken back furniture 4 times.  I just can’t – don’t want to keep it.  I don’t know why the owning of things rubs me the wrong way right now?  I want to be free of everything.  Just free.  Unburdened.  I wonder if this is a reaction to the traumatic events and fallout from such events that in a year I shall regret the drastic life changes I made while under the influence of PTSD?

So, here I find myself in the process of closing out some chapters of my life. I am holding my breath and hoping for some relief, change, a miracle?  Outcome and destination unknown.

I will leave you with some quotes from The Truman Show:

“We accept the reality of the world with which we’re presented. It’s as simple as that.”

“Good morning, and in case I don’t see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!”

 

May the force be with all of you, always.  Live long and prosper.  Moe

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